


Only Human- Destiel Fluff & Smut

by NEG85



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Ass to Mouth, Bottom Castiel/Top Dean Winchester, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Canon LGBTQ Character, Canon LGBTQ Male Character, Castiel Confesses Feelings for Dean Winchester, Castiel Talks Dirty (Supernatural), Castiel/Dean Winchester First Kiss, Dean Winchester Confesses Feelings for Castiel, Dean Winchester Talks Dirty, Dean Winchester's First Time With a Man, Domestic Castiel/Dean Winchester, Dorks in Love, Eventual Smut, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, First Time, First Time Blow Jobs, First Time Bottoming, First Time Topping, Graphic Description, Human Castiel (Supernatural), Idiots in Love, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Themes, Love Confessions, M/M, Protective Dean Winchester, Romantic Fluff, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:09:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27662501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NEG85/pseuds/NEG85
Summary: I'm exploring if Castiel turned human and stayed at the bunker with Sam and Dean during then. BUT also, once Angel's lose their grace they are fully and permanently human. They try to help him cope. Dean and Castiel end up exploring their feelings about each other verbally as well as physically.
Relationships: Castiel & Sam Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester
Comments: 6
Kudos: 95





	1. Adjusting

Cas sits on his bed reading, as Beethoven plays. His grey fuzzy sweater clearly outlines the well defined muscles in his arms and shoulders. There is a knock at his door. “Come in.” he answers. 

The door opens and in walks Dean, wearing a white apron around his waist. 

Cas looks up at Dean; a defeated look in his eyes. 

“Hey, you hungry?” Dean asks, with a hopeful look. 

“A little.” Cas offers. Their eyes meet and tingles run down Dean’s spine. 

Cas’s eyes disobey him as they steal a glance at Dean’s mouth before meeting his eyes again. 

“I thought I might make dinner tonight.” This intrigues Cas.

“Really? I didn’t know you cook, Dean.”

“Well, mainly I just grill burgers, but I thought maybe I could make something different for us. Wanna help me out?” Dean’s cheeks warm at his own semi-awkward flirty invitation. 

“Uh... sure.” Cas replies, turning off his music. Dean leads the way to the kitchen; relieved that Cas agreed to come out from his room. Ever since he lost his grace and became basically human he hasn’t been socializing much. Sam, Dean and Bobby have been concerned about how he was adjusting to his new life. 

Cas walks to the stove and looks to Dean for instructions. Dean walks to the fridge and grabs a beer for each of them, setting them down on the counter beside the stove. “I don’t know how much help I’ll be, Dean. I’ve never tried to cook anything before.” 

“That’s okay, I don’t have much experience myself. But I’ll show you how to help, okay?” This made Cas smile and he nods in agreement.

“Okay, so we are going to be making grilled cheese sandwiches with vegetable soup. It’s not quite fine dining, but I used to make it for me and Sam when we were growing up and he would complain about not getting enough vitamins. So the soup part is pretty easy, just open the can and pour it in a pot and heat it on the stove til it’s hot. And grilled cheese is just fried sandwiches. Butter and cheese with bread. That sound okay?”

“Yes that should be fine. How can I help?”

“Hmmm. How about you be in charge of the soup, and I’ll show you how to make the sandwiches?”

“Okay.” Cas responds with a slightly bigger smile than before.

“You’ll need to stir the soup occasionally so nothing sticks to the bottom.” Dean informs Cas.

Cas watches Dean butter the bread and lay the cheese on top, then add another buttered piece of bread on top. The butter sizzles in the skillet. “You hear that sizzling?” he asks Cas.

“Yes.”

“That’s what you want to hear. After you hear the sizzling, you give it a few minutes and keep checking the bread to see when it’s browned.”

Cas automatically reaches out his hand and before Dean can react, and instantly scorches it on the pan. He draws it back quickly and whimpers.

Dean’s heart sinks and he grabs Cas and pulls him a few feet away from the stove to inspect his wound. “Cas, you have to be more careful. You have to use a spatula to check the sandwiches while they’re cooking. Can I see?” Dean asks, reaching out for Cas’ hand.

He holds his burnt hand out. Dean tenderly holds his wrist and spots a pinkish-red thick line on Cas’ palm. “It doesn’t look too bad, but I know it hurts. Let me see where our burn ointment is, real quick. I’ll be right back.” Dean walks to the stove, turning off both burners before heading to the bathroom. He is back momentarily with a tube of some kind of cream and a thick bandage. 

“Come over here, for a minute.” Dean instructs. They walk over to the table and sit down. He is still holding Cas’ wrist. Cas watches him open the tube and put a thin layer over his burn and then cover it with the bandage. Cas winces in pain as Dean applies slight pressure to place the tape over the bandage. “Sorry.” Dean tells him. “It’s okay.” Cas replies. 

Their eyes meet again and Dean realizes he is still touching Cas’ wrist. He purposely clears his throat, lets go of his wrist and stands up. 

Cas follows him back to the stove. “Do you still want my help?” He asks shyly. “Of course.” Dean says, reassuring him.

Dean turns the burners back on and hands Cas a wooden spoon to stir the soup. He grabs the spatula and checks the bread. It’s perfectly golden brown, so he flips the sandwich over and the sizzling is back. The smell from the sandwich cooking starts to flow through the air in the kitchen. Cas takes a deep breath and is pleasantly surprised by the aroma.

“Don’t forget to stir the soup.” Dean repeated. Cas had forgotten to stir for the past few minutes, as he was watching him make the sandwiches. Steam was steadily pouring from the soup and the last sandwich was finished. Dean turns the burners off again and grabs two plates and bowls.

Cas grabs both beers and sets them on the table. Dean fills one plate and bowl and sets it in front of Cas before getting his own. They sit across from each other at the table. “How’s the hand?”  
“Still a little sore.” Cas admits. Dean gets up and brings back a spoon for each of them to the table. “And see, the best part is you can do this.” Dean says as he dips his sandwich in the soup. “Go ahead, try it.” he insists excitedly. 

Cas follows Dean’s actions and tries a bite of the interesting combination.

“Mmmm.” Cas happily responds to the tasty new dish.

It makes Dean happy that Cas likes the food.

“So, what were you reading?” Dean asks as they continue their meal.

“A book of poetry, Robert Frost.” 

Dean isn’t sure how to respond to that. He doesn’t know anything about poetry. “You read a lot of poetry?” 

“I always found it interesting, but now there seems to be new elements to it reading as a human.” 

Dean tries to focus on not letting his eyes go wide in slight panic. He is totally lost now, and his mind is blank. ‘Say something. You started this conversation, now just talk.’ he scolds himself.

“What kind of elements?” he hears himself ask.

“The words seem to resonate with the emotions of the reader in a personal way, despite not knowing the author.”

‘Wow, this is a Sam conversation.’ Dean thinks. “So, we’ve been worried about you, Cas. How are you doing, really?” Dean changes the subject and surprises himself with such a direct question.

Cas sighs. “It...It is definitely a change that will take some getting used to.” he responds hesitantly.

“I’m sure it will. But you’ll be fine, man.” Dean offers. “You’ll get used to being human and things won’t seem strange anymore.”

“You think I am strange?” Cas asks, cocking his head.

Dean chuckles, then clears his throat. “Uh, I mean yeah kinda. But it’s just awkward because you’re new to this whole thing. It’s gonna take time, that’s all.”

Cas nods, taking note of Dean’s words.


	2. Research

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel starts researching what it means to be human. Things get...sexy.

It’s been about a week since Castiel and Dean had made a meal together and enjoyed it, just the two of them. His hand still aches from the burn from the skillet. He keeps thinking of how Dean carefully attended to his wound. 

He swears he felt something when Dean had looked at him after applying the bandage, still gently holding his wrist. He wasn’t sure what he felt, but something. He has noticed in the last week or so, he has started having unfamiliar...feelings? Urges? He doesn’t have words for them.

Dean had given Cas a laptop of his own and showed him how to search for things online. That’s where he discovered classical music and poetry. He also came across adorable animal videos that made him laugh. He’s still in awe of how much information and interesting things are on this ‘internet’ thing. 

He had come across some strange, troubling things that he quickly navigated away from; But mostly he has discovered nice things that take his mind off of the pressures and newness and overwhelming things about being human.

Today is no different than the last few days. He hops from video to video, taking in more and more aspects about what it means to be human. There are occasionally pop up ads and such that would come up on the screen. Sam had advised him to simply hit the X in the top corner of the window of those to make them go away.

It had only happened once or twice. He tries to click on another potentially interesting video and doesn’t notice the pop up until he has already unintentionally clicked on it. 

The screen is now totally different from what Cas is used to seeing. It is a site showing graphic images of naked humans that are engaging in sexual intercourse but also many other aspects of physical activities that Castiel is completely unfamiliar with. 

Being an Angel of course he knows what sex, making love, mating, means in general. Obviously he isn’t unfamiliar with the life cycle either (in theory). But...these acts being played out on his screen are not things he has learned about in the many millennia of his long life. ‘What is the purpose of these acts? They are not a necessary part of the mating process.’ Castiel muses.

Castiel can’t help but be curious about these parts of physical intimacy. Purely in the effort to continue learning more about what it means to be human, he finds himself clicking on more and more images. Finally there is a video that starts playing, showing him exactly how some of these acts are done and the reactions humans have to them. 

There is a woman placing a man’s penis in her mouth and moving her head. The man makes noises indicating that this is a pleasurable experience. “Oh yeah, suck my dick. Your mouth feels so good, baby.” The man says. The woman makes similar pleasure noises and Cas is a little confused. ‘How does this give the woman pleasure?’ He realizes after watching this video that a part of his body seems to be….changing?

He reaches down and touches the area that seems to be..moving. His hand feels that his penis is larger. ‘Hmm..interesting.’ He thinks, feeling a slight...something. He moves his hand away and clicks on another video. This video is equally as informative and intriguing. 

This video is of a man licking and putting his mouth on another man’s penis. He is moving his hand along with his mouth. “Yes, I love when you suck my dick. You like my cock, don’t you?” Cas feels an unwitting twitch where his hand had been. He curiously brings his hand back to the area and notices his skin feels tighter now. His penis is standing completely erect now, straight up. His hand brushing across the crotch of his pants sends a small pleasurable feeling through him.

He clicks on another video and this one is a man with his penis in his hand. Another man crouches in front of him watching his hand jerk his penis. The man doing the jerking is making lots of noises indicating pleasure. What’s more interesting to Castiel though, is the man crouching in front, just watching the other man’s actions. He is also making noises indicating pleasure. This seems strange to Castiel. ‘Now this human isn’t a part of the sexual act at all, yet he seems to still be deriving pleasure from...watching the other human’s actions?’ 

The man doing the jerking is making louder noises now, indicating increased pleasure. The crouching man’s noises also increase in volume. “Jerk your cock for me, baby. I wanna see you cum for me. Cum for me. Cum on me.” Suddenly thick white spews out of the standing man’s penis and covers the crouching man’s face. The standing man continues to jerk his penis and both men continue to make noises of pleasure for another few seconds. The video ends with Cum dripping from the man’s face.

Castiel takes a moment to consider what he has just watched and both men’s actions and responses. He notices his heart rate is increasing. There’s a knock. He gets up and walks over, opening his door. 

“Hey Castiel. Um, I see Dean gave you the laptop we got for you.” Sam barely makes eye contact.

“Yes, thank you. I have been doing research about what it means to be human.” Cas answers, matter-of-factly.

“Oh, that’s good. There’s a lot of things to learn, I guess.” Sam offers an awkward forced smile before darting his eyes away again.

“Is everything alright, Sam?” Castiel asks, concerned noticing Sam’s unusual mannerisms.

“Me? Oh, yeah. Everything’s good Cas. Hey did Dean happen to give you any um...headphones or earbuds or anything?”

Cas cocks his head to the side and gets that look on his face like he does when he’s considering something. “Headphones?” he finally repeats.

“Yeah, they are listening devices you put over your ears so that you can hear music or whatever from your computer. Like let’s say if it was late at night and you didn’t want to wake anyone up but wanted to watch a movie that was going to have loud explosions. You would want to wear headphones that way you would still be able to enjoy the movie, without other people hearing it too and maybe waking them up.”

Castiel nods, feeling as if he understands. “No, I do not have headphones for listening to my computer.” Cas answers.

“Okay, well here. You can have these. I’ve been meaning to switch to earbuds anyway” Sam says, handing him a plain pair of old fashioned padded black corded headphones. Sam demonstrates how to use them, and shows him how and where to plug them into the laptop. “There you go, now you’re all set.”

“Thank you, Sam.” Cas says as he closes his door and sits back on his bed. He sets the headphones on the end table beside the bed. 

Eager to continue his research, he clicks on another video, and another. He has watched several more videos and he feels….uncomfortable. His pants feel too tight now in the crotch area. 

His underwear feels pressed up against him. He pulls the fabric out away from his skin, and his hand brushing the tip of his penis sends a wave of pleasure through him.

The sensation shocks him. He’s taken aback for a moment. Then he runs his fingers across the area again testing it and the same pleasure spreads, his head instinctively pulls backward.

He clicks back to the video of the man jerking his penis in front of the crouching man. He watches it again. He studies how the man moves his hand and his reaction. Cas feels his heart rate start to increase even more. ‘So humans can have a physical reaction to watching other humans engaging in sexual acts.’

He opens his belt and unbuttons his pants. Pulling them down along with his underwear, he reaches down pulling them off his legs and drops them to the floor. 

He looks down at his fully erect penis and notices the tip is leaking a small amount of clear liquid. He touches his finger to the slit at the top, and a surge of pleasure hits him again. He takes a deep breath.

He replays the video. And again. Watching, still carefully studying the man’s hand movements. The video ends again. He places his hand firmly on his shaft. He already feels pleasure with this. He starts moving his hand up and down his length imitating the jerking motion of his wrist, like the man in the video had done. 

He feels his heart start to race even more and his body starts to feel hot. His breathing gets shallow as he continues. The waves of pleasure just keep increasing. The sensation is getting more and more intense.

A low whimpering moan escapes his throat. He hears the crouching man’s words again in his head. “Jerk your cock for me. Cum for me.” An image flashes through his mind. Castiel standing naked in front of Dean crouching in front of him. Watching him. He can even imagine hearing those lustful, deliciously vulgar words in Dean’s voice. “Jerk your cock for me, Cas. Cum for me.” 

This image and imagining hearing those words in Dean’s voice is enough to make his breath catch and his hips start to rock in time with his hand motions. A loud moan rumbles out from deep in his chest and suddenly he feels like he is losing control. It is terrifying but thrilling; the pleasure surges through him and he feels as if he’s being electrocuted. 

His teeth grit together, and his hand continues to move so fast now it’s like he’s not even controlling it anymore. He finally sees thick white cum erupt as he is pushed over the edge. It flows down. covering his hand. His whole body continues to twitch as his hand slows to a stop. His hips no longer rocking and his hand drops to the bed.

He relaxes and breathes. His mind tries to assess what all just happened but he can’t think straight. His thoughts, emotions, and physical feelings all swirl around together. Suddenly Cas feels as if he can’t keep his eyes open, completely drained of energy. He falls asleep.

Castiel continues his research, staying in his room more and more. He comes out to make an occasional sandwich and a drink but then mostly he has been retreating to his room. Sam knows what’s going on, but Dean hasn’t been informed. He starts worrying about him. It’s been about two weeks now that Cas has been keeping to himself. Sam is out checking out a lead for a case and Dean decides to go check on Cas.

He knocks on Castiel’s bedroom door, hears some type of weird music and then Cas says “Yes!” so he opens the door, stepping in the room. Dean sees Castiel naked on his bed, fully hard jerking his dick with his eyes closed and head back, moaning. Whatever the weird music was, is silent now. 

Dean’s jaw drops open and Cas’s eyes open to see Dean standing there watching him. Panic sets in for a split second for Castiel, but then he realizes his hand is still moving and he is so close to finishing he doesn’t think he can stop. He moans louder and he hears himself speak.

“You like watching me jerk my cock? You want me to cum for you, baby?” The words leave Castiel’s mouth and he is just as shocked as Dean is to hear them. Dean’s face is unreadable but his breathing becomes irregular. All Dean can do is watch silently as Castiel’s throbbing cock is jerked while his moans fill the room.

Dean gulps and his face changes. “Don’t stop, Cas. I wanna see it. Cum for me. I wanna see you cum.” he says biting his lip and feels his own cock now fully erect twitches. He takes a few steps forward, now standing right beside the bed.

This sends Cas over the edge and his breath catches. “OH, DEAN!” he moans, so loud as his thick cum gushes out and drips down his hand. His hand slows with his breath. His whole body twitches. ‘Holy Fuck that was so goddamn hot!’ Dean thinks as he tries to process everything. 

His cock aches for relief and spits pre-cum. He’s not sure what to do now. He’s more turned on than he’s ever been in his life. ‘But..this is Cas! Not to mention would Cas even want anything more?’ He’s not sure how much Cas even knows about sex stuff and certainly doesn’t want him to feel forced like he has to do something he doesnt want to.

“Cas.” Dean finally says.

Castiel looks at him but doesn’t say anything. His breathing is still shallow.

“Where the FUCK did that come from?” Dean asks.

“I was doing research on what it means to be human.” Cas answers.

“Do you want me to help you with your research?” Dean asks boldly, though not sure Cas will understand what he’s asking.

“You just did.” Cas answers, a smile spreads across his face.

Dean closes the door and locks it. He walks back over to Cas’ bed and leans in to his face. Would you like more help?” Dean asks.

Castiel’s smile fades, his eyes meet Dean’s. Cas nods and swallows dryly. “Yes, please.”

“Do you want me to kiss you?” Dean asks, leaning in just inches from Cas’ lips now.

Cas closes the distance and gently places his mouth over Dean’s soft full lips. Dean slips his tongue between Cas’ lips and explores, claiming the inside of his mouth. He swallows Cas’ moans and locks his fingers around Cas’ hair. The passionate gentle kiss lasts a few moments before Dean pulls back.

Castiel pants, his erection returning. “Can I touch you, Cas?” Dean asks, biting his lip, looking down at his hardening cock. “Yes, please touch me, Dean.” Castiel begs. Dean places his hand on Castiel’s dick and jerks slowly, looking straight into Cas’ eyes. 

“Dean, I wanna see you. Can I see your body?” Cas asks, panting.

Dean nods his head. He pulls his hand away, pulls his shirt over his head and drops it to the floor. Unbuttoning and unzipping his jeans, he pulls them down. His boxers barely cover his fully erect cock. He slowly pulls down his boxers, then gets rid of the remaining clothes. He stands still now, watching Cas look wide eyed at his naked body. He reaches over and starts jerking Cas again.

“What else do you want, Cas?” Dean asks.

Cas struggles to think, feeling Dean’s hand on him is so incredible. “There are things that look….interesting but...I don’t...I’ve never….” he trails off.

“I’ve done some things before Cas, but...never with a guy. This right now is the first time I’ve ever touched another guy like this.” Dean admits.

“I don’t wanna ask for anything that you wouldn’t like, Dean.” Cas answers.

Dean moves his hand away. ‘Now’s as good a time as any to tell him how I feel.’ Dean tells himself. “I want to do things with you, Cas. I’ve...thought about it a lot since we’ve known each other. But I figured as an Angel you didn’t have the same...urges or types of feelings for me. Are you sure you want me to be the one you...continue your research with?”

“Of course. You’re the one I trust above all else. Humans, Angels, any other beings that exist. I thought you knew that’s what I meant when I said we have a very profound bond. The bond you and I share...it’s unlike any I’ve had before even with my brother and sister Angels that I’ve known for eons. That I’ve served with in the garrison. Plus...You’re the one I’ve been imagining trying things out with. The times I have imagined you and I fulfilling these acts have been most pleasurable. I understand now why humans do not simply have sex in order to create new life. It seems cruel to expect that of them--us.”

Dean gulps and his heart feels…. light. He clears his throat. “Well, your ‘research’- I assume it was porn?”

“Porn?” Cas tilts his head.

“Videos of people having sex and stuff.”

“Oh, well then yes.”

“You can show me some videos of things you might want to try. I won’t be mad if I don’t want to try something you ask about, okay? We can just find something else.”

“Okay.” Cas agrees. 

Cas sits up and goes back to a video he saw earlier. He looks over to Dean, shyly. “There’s..two things I want to try.”

“Okay. So, show me.”

Cas clicks play on the video and it is of one man giving the other a blowjob. Pretty simple, but it is new to Cas, so he is interested but unsure. “This is the other one.” Cas said. He clicks play and this one is of anal sex.

One man has his ass in the air and face buried in the bed while the guy behind him licks his ass, toys with his hole while pulling his hair then got him lubed up and ready before fucking him. As the guy was fucking him, he is biting and kissing on the other man’s shoulder, neck and back. ‘DAMN! Kinda rough actually.’ Dean thinks as the video ends.

“So, would you want to try either of those? It’s okay if you don’t. We can find something else.” Cas says.

“Are you sure you’re ready for some of the things in those videos, Cas?” Dean checks, just to make sure he’s not getting ahead of himself.

“Um, well the guys in the videos sure seem to enjoy it. So, I thought maybe I would too.” Cas answers. “We don’t have to do everything they do in the videos, Dean. Only whatever you are comfortable with.”

“Okay, I’ll be right back.” Dean says, leaving the bedroom and the door open behind him. A few minutes later, he comes back in and shuts and locks the bedroom door again. He has something in his hand.

“Cas?” Dean asks.

“Yeah Dean?”

Dean crouches down and gets on his knees beside the bed. “Come here.” he says, pulling Cas’ thighs toward him at the end of the bed. Whatever Dean had in his hand, it isn’t there now. Cas sits at the edge of the bed and Dean puts his hand back on Cas’ now semi-hard cock. He starts jerking again, slowly then increases his speed. Cas begins to pant. “Mmmmmmmm” Cas moans, his back arching and eyes closing. 

“Tell me what you want, Cas. Tell me you want me to wrap my lips around your dick. Tell me you want my mouth on your cock.”

Cas’ hips begin to buck with the rhythm of Dean’s hand. “I want your lips….I want you to wrap your lips around my dick, Dean. I….. want your mouth on my cock.” Castiel growls.

Hearing those vulgar words from Cas makes Dean think he might cum right then and there. Once Dean is satisfied that Cas is hard enough now, he takes him into his mouth without hesitation. He wraps his lips delicately around Cas’ head and down over his shaft as far as he can go before starting to gag. He pulls back a little and tries again. He takes his full length now, all the way to the base.

“Oh, fuck Dean. Ohhhh. That feels so good. Your mouth feels so good on me.” Cas whimpers.

Dean takes the encouragement and starts swirling his tongue around Cas’ shaft. Cas moans louder. Hands automatically start pulling at Dean’s hair. Cas’ hips rock as he starts to feel the build up he has gotten used to when he gets close to finishing.

Dean pulls back and away from Cas completely. Cas panting, whines. His dick sopping wet and saliva dripping down his thighs. He feels cold now, from losing the heat of Dean’s mouth and throat.

“Scoot back and lay down” Dean says, as he stands up. Cas obeys. Dean spreads Cas’ legs and gets between them. He leans forward and kisses Castiel again, feeling as if their last kiss was ages ago and he just can’t get enough. Dean moans into Cas’ mouth and feels Cas’ dick twitch against his stomach. Dean pulls away, their lips both wet now from their eager tongues exploring each other’s mouth.

Dean starts to reach down into the pocket of his jeans next to the bed, but then stops himself. “Roll over.” Dean commands. Cas obeys, his aching cock dribbling pre-cum at the thought of Dean about to fuck him.

Dean spreads Cas’ cheeks and gently drags his tongue across his entrance. Then he tongues all around it, back to the middle, pushing, harder, tongue fucking his ass. His own cock wet now from excitement. “Uuuuuuuuhhhhnnnnnn” Cas moans loudly. “Yyyeessss. Oh Dean, fuck!” Cas shouts then bites his lip.

Dean’s cock is aching for Cas’ hole. Dean digs the lube from his jeans and pours some on Cas. He rubs two fingers across the lubed up hole and slowly begins working them in. Little by little by little. Cas isn’t even able to moan loudly, he’s so overwhelmed with pleasure and this new experience he just tries to breathe and rocks his hips back onto Dean’s fingers.

“Think you’re ready for me now, Cas?”

“YES! Please, Dean.”

Dean rolls him over to his back. 

Cas looks confused. 

Dean spreads Cas’ legs again and gets between them. He scoots up and puts Cas’ legs over his shoulders. “But I thought-”

Dean cuts him off. “I wanna see your face as I fuck you.”

Cas’ face is red, his body is hot with anticipation and excitement.

Dean pushes the head of his cock against the pink ring of Cas’ entrance. Harder and Harder he pushes until he hears Cas scream “DON’T STOP!” So he doesn't. He pushes all the way down until he hits that bundle of nerves- Cas’ prostate. “Uuuuuuuhhhhh.” Cas moans, his mouth agape, looking into Dean’s eyes.

“Cas do you want me to move now?” Dean barely gets out.

“Yes.” Cas half demands, half begs.

“Oh god, Cas. Fuck! You want me to talk dirty to you?” Dean asks, as he starts thrusting into Cas.

Cas moans and breath catches. “YES.”

“god Cas you feel so good. Oh, fuck. Your ass is so tight. Does my cock feel good in your ass, baby? Tell me how good it feels for me to fuck you, Cas.”

“Your cock feels so good, Dean. Uuuuuuhhhhhnnn! Mmmmmmmm! Fuck!”

“You want me to stop?” Dean asks, speeding up his thrusts. Looking straight in Cas’ blue eyes.

Cas closes his eyes and moans.

“Look at me!” Dean growls. Cas obeys. “Tell me Cas, do you want me to stop?”

“NO, please no don’t stop.” Cas whimpers.

“Tell me what you want. Tell me to fuck you. Do you want me to fuck you harder? Tell me how bad you need my cock. Tell me how bad you want me to fuck you.” Dean commands.

“Oh, god don’t stop. Fuck me, Dean. I need your cock in my ass. Please fuck me. Fuck me hard, harder. Fuck me please.”

Dean feels the build up. He won’t last very much longer. He watches Castiel’s face twisted in pleasure as he fucks him and fills his ass with his cock. ‘Almost there’ Dean tells himself.

“Do you want me to cum inside you, Cas? Tell me what you want. Tell me you want me to fill your ass with my cum. Tell me.” Dean bites his lip and knows he’s almost there. Dean moans loudly, thrusting harder and deeper hitting Cas’ prostate hard- hard- hard.

“Dean, please cum in me. Fill my ass with your cum. I need your cum in my ass, Dean. Fuck.” Cas yells and turns into a just as loud moan, as he cums.

Dean thrusts hard-hard-hard, holding tight onto Cas’ hips watching his white cream spill onto his stomach. He’s pushed over the edge feeling Cas’ spasming hole squeeze his cock tighter and moans as loud as Cas. Still thrusting as his hot seed flows into his lover’s ass. 

Cas’ face is red and eyes closed as he takes in all the fucking swirling pleasure of his own orgasm and Dean continuing to hit his prostate over and over and then feeling Dean’s hot cum filling his ass. 

Dean pants, and his hips finally slow to a stop with his cock still completely in Cas’s hole. He doesn’t want to waste a drop. He wants Cas to have it all. 

Finally able to move again, he pulls slightly back and his shrinking cock comes out of Cas. Thick creamy cum oozes from Castiel’s ass. Dean lets his body sink into Cas, resting his head on his chest. Cas wraps his arms around Dean, running his fingers through his hair. 

They both just breathe and try to regain any of the blood back enough to the rest of their body so they can process any type of thoughts at all. For now, they just feel- warm, spent, home. They fall asleep in each other’s arms.


	3. Panic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean wakes up and reality sets in about what happened yesterday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I edited this chapter, changing the talk between Sam and Dean a little to make it more realistic and emotional. Hope you like the update :D

Dean wakes up beside Cas and panics. He gets up slowly, grabbing his clothes and getting dressed as quietly and quickly as he can. He looks back over at Cas, lightly snoring, hair a mess and smiles. His heart still racing, he tries to calm himself. 

‘This is Cas. It’s not just some random chick you spent the night with. And he lives...here.’ His attempt to calm himself, has the opposite effect. ‘What the hell did I do? I mean, I don’t regret it but shouldn’t I? I should have considered what would come next after...all that. god, what does this even mean? Does this mean we’re a couple? Do I want to be a couple? Does Cas want us to be a couple? Is he ready for a relationship? Am I? What will Sam think? Fuck, what if I ruined everything? What if we can’t even be friends anymore?’

Feeling like he’s suffocating, he grabs his coat, the keys and heads out. “Just need to get out for a bit. Just drive.” he tells himself out loud. He rolls the window down and instantly feels his body calming. Listening to Baby purr as he drives, he takes a deep breath. Then another, then another. He turns the radio on and pulls into a side road, pulling over into the grass.

He grabs his phone and dials, putting it to his ear. It rings twice. “Dean?”  
Sammy, hey can you uh come meet me.”

“Dean, what’s going on? Is everything okay?” Sam asks, sleepily. I thought you were- aren’t you home. At the bunker?”

“Nah, I uh. I was, just woke up and needed to get some air. But uh, can you just come meet me so we can talk. Please.”

“Yeah, sure. Just gimme about 10 minutes and I’ll head out. Where are you?” 

“I’m just down the road about 2 miles pulled off on Charlotte street just before you leave town.”

“Oh-kay Dean. I’ll be there in a few.” Sam says, hanging up.

It’s been about 15 minutes when Dean sees Sam’s car pull over beside him. He gets out, and climbs into the passenger seat of the impala next to his older brother. Rubbing his eyes, he leans his head against the back of the seat. “Alright, Dean. What’s going on? What’s this about?”

“Um, Sam I…” Dean looks down, clearing his throat. Looking up at his brother, he smiles weakly. “Something- happened yesterday.” he says, looking away again.

“Okay. What happened, Dean?”

“Well, I uh I’ve been noticing that Cas has been kinda keeping to himself lately. More and more, and barely coming out of his room. So, I- ya know, I started to kinda worry about him. He’s still adjusting to the whole being human thing.”

When Dean looks back to Sam, he’s smiling and trying not to laugh. 

“Why are you-”

Sam cuts him off. “Go on.” he pushes.

“Ah, okay. So, I went to check on him. There was some weird kind of music on, I knocked and he said yes, so I came in and...well..” Dean trails off, scratching the side of his face.

Sam let out a loud deep laugh.

Dean’s eyes shoot straight to him. “What the hell are you laughing at?”

It takes Sam a minute before he’s able to speak. “Um, Dean, Cas has… kinda discovered porn.” he said, trying not to crack up again, but failing.

Dean’s face turns beet red. “Yeah, I...found that out.” he said.

“So that’s what you ‘needed some air’ about? Because you walked in on Cas watching porn yesterday?” Sam snickered.

Dean stiffens his jaw. “Yes, well- no. That’s…” he takes a deep breath. “I need you to be serious for a minute man. I...need some advice.”

Sam’s face straightens right out, all that shows now is shock. “Go on.” he urges.

“I know- trust me, I do not want to be talking about this with you of all people, but- I gotta tell you something and you gotta promise me you won’t freak out. You won’t...I don’t know, just don’t react.”

Sam looks at Dean, puzzled. “Okay, I promise I won’t react.” he offers.

Dean looks at him, skeptically. “I mean it, don’t react!”

“No reaction.” Sam says.

“Well, I walked in on that and...uh, well…” he takes a deep breath and just spits it out. “Things...happened. With me and Cas. Things that….I’ve never, he’s never uh…”

Sam’s eyes wide, desperately clamping his lips together to keep his jaw from hitting the floor. 

Dean doesn’t look at him.

It’s a good thing, because right now Sam’s face easily reads ‘HOLY SHIT!’.

Sam stays silent, trying to process his thoughts and not to show a reaction. After all, it’s a big deal that Dean is even coming to him about this. He doesn’t talk to anyone about this kind of stuff, so it must be important.

Sam takes a deep breath and clears his throat. Feeling like he’s getting more control over seemingly not having a reaction now. “Okay, so did you want to talk about what happened?”

“God no!” Dean shudders.

“OH, THANK GOD!” Sam says under his breath.

“Why would I-”

“Just- what is it you wanted to talk about then, Dean?”

“I don’t regret what happened. But...should I? I mean, it’s Cas. Did I make a mistake? I’m not...sure why. I’ve never told anyone before, but...it’s not just Cas. I’ve...always like guys, Sammy. I mean, I like girls too, but I do like guys. I guess the way Dad was, I always felt like I had to be...and I couldn’t….”

“And I guess I was always afraid of how you’d feel. I thought maybe you wouldn’t be able to see me as just your big brother anymore or something. People lose family, lose everything over this kind of thing, Sam. I’ve never….been brave enough to even….” His shoulders slump, he hangs his head. Tears fill his eyes.

Sam gave Dean an understanding look. “Dean, there’s nothing wrong with liking guys. Or girls, or both.”

“Yeah, I mean.. that’s...always been how I’ve felt about other people. I always try not to judge, but to actually admit….” his head drops again. He swallows, licks his lips and stiffens his jaw, looking away.

Sam sighs. “Hey.”

Dean looks back at him, eyes full of tears.

“I don’t think of you any differently because of that Dean. And if anyone does, they suck and they are the one/s who are wrong for that.” 

“You mean it?” his face scrunches a little, breaking the barrier.

“Dean, how could you think I would ever judge you, especially about something like this. Dean you raised me. I owe you my entire life. There’s nothing you wouldn’t do for me, hell there’s nothing you haven’t done for me. You think I would ever just throw you away? Don’t you ever be worried about that. Not ever.”

“Thanks, man.” Dean says, swallowing and staring at the floorboard. He wipes his face and sighs.

“Well, what about Cas? I mean, what if…”

“Just talk to him, Dean. See how he feels about it. Maybe he’s worried about the same thing now too. Just be honest, tell him how you feel and listen when he tells you how he feels.”

Dean looks away, shaking his head in agreement. “Thanks Sammy.”

“Of course. 

“So, what if I don’t know how I feel? Or well, what I want?” Dean asks, making eye contact again.

“Just be honest. If you need time, tell him. And take the time to figure out what it is that you want.”

“Yeah, a lot easier said than done.”

“I know, man. But it’s Cas. He’ll understand.” Sam opens the passenger door and steps out. “Alright, I’m gonna head back and make some coffee. Want me to save you a cup?”

Dean considers it for a moment. “Nah, I- think I’m gonna drive a little more. I’ll be home with some food in about an hour though. If Cas gets up before I get back-”

Sam leans over, looking at Dean from the still open door.

“Tell him to call me.” Dean finishes.

“You got it.” Sam says, closing the door and walking back to his car.

Dean starts the engine and heads off again. ‘What do I want?’ he asks himself.


	4. Moment of Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean needs to think about how he feels and what he wants. And what he's going to do about it.

Dean sits in the impala, still in the same spot he was in when he had talked to Sam. He tries to sort through his feelings, and what he wants, and what he might be able to actually have. Then his issues and flaws and past come into play too. He told Sam he’d be back in an hour with food, so he starts the car and heads to grab something to bring back to the bunker.

Walking into the kitchen, he sets the bag on the table. “Breakfast.” he announces with a smile. “Sam, I got you two egg white only- egg and cheese biscuits. I got Cas two sausage egg and cheese biscuits. And for me, I got hash browns and two bacon egg cheese, extra bacon, add sausage biscuits.” Sam scoffs.

“So, what Cas isn’t up yet?”

“I haven’t seen him.”

“Alright, I’ll go get him.”

“Thanks for the food, man.”

“Yeah, sure. No problem.”

Heading down the hall, he gets to Cas’ room and hesitantly knocks.

“Yeah?” Cas answers, sleepily.

Dean opens the door, and walks in, shutting the door behind him. He sits on the bed next to Cas. “Hey, I went and got us some breakfast. I got us some biscuits. I’ll even share my hashbrowns with you, if you want.

Cas groans. He peaks up at Dean, furrowing his brows. “When did you leave?”

“A little bit ago. I just needed to get out for a bit, so I went for a drive. Then I stopped and got us some food.”

Cas puts his head back down.

Dean smiles and leans over beside him. “Hey, come on, food’s getting cold.” he says.

Peeking up at him again, Cas pulls back the covers, invitingly.

Without hesitation, Dean slides under, scooting over against Cas and pulling the covers over him.

Sliding over, Cas moves until his full weight is on Dean, lying on top of him, waist between Dean’s legs. Head against Dean’s chest and arms snug against his torso.

“It’s so nice in here with you.” Dean says. 

“Let me warm you up.”

Dean’s fingers instinctively start combing through Cas’ hair and fingernails lightly drag against his bare shoulder. He realizes he can feel Cas’ heartbeat and it makes him feel peaceful. Closing his eyes, he unintentionally matches his breathing to Cas’.

After a few minutes, Cas groans. He looks up toward Dean. “Come on, let’s get up.”

“But it’s so nice and cozy.” he whines in protest, wrapping his arms around Cas.

Cas smiles, chuckling. “Yeah, but come on. You brought food, let’s eat.”

“No.” Dean says, not letting go.” 

“Let me up, jerk. You woke me up for food, so come on, let’s go eat it.”

“Wait.” He presses a lingering gentle kiss against Cas’ lips. Then slowly pulls back.

Cas crashes their lips together again, into a deeper kiss. Tasting him again, he finds himself desperately unbuttoning Dean’s shirt. 

Dean’s hands move to Cas’ still naked thighs, pulling him up to his hips. He wraps his arms around Cas’ waist. 

Getting the last of his shirt undone, Cas breaks the kiss. He runs his hands and lips across Dean’s chest, then down his stomach to the top of his jeans. 

“Oh god, baby.” Dean moans.

The heat from Cas’ naked body against him seeps through his jeans. Dean leans up, kissing and nibbling along Cas’ neck. 

Cas moans and pants, grinding against Dean.

“Fuck, Cas.” 

“Dean.” is all Cas can say before he dives back into another passionate kiss. 

Dean pulls Cas up along with him, sitting them up. 

They continue rocking their hips against each other and Cas kisses all over Dean’s muscular shoulders, working his way back up his neck. 

“Cas wait, come here.” Dean says, pushing his shoulders back from him a little.

“Yeah?” Cas asks, panting. Looking at him, confused.

“I need to tell you something.” Dean says with sincerity in his voice.

Cas leans back a little more, concern showing in his eyes.

“I want you.”

Cas chuckles. “I want you, too.” he leans in for another kiss.

Dean stops him.

Cas’ smile fades.

“No, I mean..” he sighs. “I...I don’t wanna do things with you for ‘research’. I-I wanna be with you. As in, I love you, Cas. Like, in love with you. Head over heels, crazy about you. I’m done running from it, hiding from it. I love you. I’ve loved you for so long. And..if you’ll let me, I wanna take care of you. That’s why I needed to get out earlier. I needed to think about us and where we are now because of yesterday. Having to face why yesterday happened. It’s time to face my feelings. To not be afraid to say what I want. And to make an effort of going after what I want, instead of making excuses because I’m afraid. And ..what I want--- is you. I’m in love with you Castiel.” He says with tears filling his eyes.

“But Dean, I- I don’t have my grace. I’m not an Angel anymore. I can’t heal you, I can’t fly, I don’t have any powers. I’m human. Why would you want to be with me?”

Dean put his hands on either side of Cas’ face. Tears falling, he answers. “Because I don’t love you for what you can do for me. I love you because you make me happy. You make me feel safe, loved, accepted. You bring peace to the chaos of my life. I don’t care whether you have powers or not, or even if you’re human or not. Who you are is what matters. And you’re the one I want to see smile and listen to you snore. I wanna wake up to your messy hair and grumpiness in the mornings. I wanna make you laugh, remind you how amazing you are when you forget. I wanna snuggle with you and listen to you breathe. Feel your heartbeat. Fall asleep next to you. Make you suffer through my favorite westerns, and have you make me suffer through chick flicks and Hallmark movies that I enjoy more than I like to admit.” he chuckles, lightly stroking the side of Cas’ face. “You’ve always been there for me and..I wanna do better. Be better. I wanna try to always show you how much you mean to me. I wanna listen more and yell less. I’m gonna start working on my anger. I’m so sorry for all the times I’ve hurt you, been unkind, pushed you away. I’m not gonna promise perfect, or happily ever after. But --I wanna try. And I wanna do it with you beside me. So now, the question is... what do YOU want, Cas?”

Cas’ eyes fill with tears. “I’m in love with you, Dean Winchester. Have been for a while now.” he laughs a little, sniffling. “Ever since the day we met- I loved you. Even before I knew what that meant. You taught me about family, about what it means to love, REALLY love someone. You taught me about loyalty. You believed in me, stood by me even when I let you down. Even when I was wrong, and made bad choices. You forgave me over and over. Yes, you may get angry and yell and push me away. But you also let me in. You tell me things and share things with me that nobody else gets to see. So, yes Dean. I want you. And I don’t expect you to be perfect. I want you, all of you. Flaws and mistakes included. Because you accept all of mine too. I want all of that- I want a life together. And I want it all with you.” he says, voice breaking. He smiles as the droplets of his tears begin to fall.

Dean pulls Cas in, meeting his mouth again for a deep kiss. “I love you, Cas.” he says against his lips. “I love you. I want you. I need you. Stay with me. Stay forever. Be mine.” he says between gentle kisses.

“You have me. For always. I’m yours, Dean.” Cas answers, against Dean’s lips, between quick kisses. He pushes Dean’s shirt off his shoulders. Dean tosses it away. Dean rolls them over and kisses along Cas’ neck, shoulders and chest.

“I wanna make love to you, Cas. Would you like that?” he asks, looking into his eyes.

“I-I don’t know what that means. You mean sex?” Cas asks shyly.

“It’s between people in love, because it’s about a deeper connection than just physical. I could never do it with anyone other than you. People talk about it, it’s in books and movies. I’ve never experienced it. But I want to, with you.”

“We can figure it out together, then.” Cas says, kissing Dean again.

Dean and Cas walk into the kitchen, hand in hand. They can’t seem to stop smiling. 

“Good afternoon.” Sam says, smirking.

“Any coffee left?” Dean asks Sam, innocently.

“Well, yeah. But it’s cold.”

“That’s okay.” Dean answers, pouring a cup and setting it beside Cas. Then he pours another cup.

“Food?” Cas asks, looking to Dean.

Dean smiles, sitting beside Cas with his own coffee. He slides Cas’ biscuits to him and pulls his own out of the bag. He winks at Cas. Cas blushes in response. They start eating and sipping their coffee sneaking glances at each other, smiling.

Sam chuckles to himself. “So how are things?” he asks, directing the question to both Cas and Dean. Sitting down directly in front of them, elbow on the table, hand on his chin.

Dean and Cas glance at each other, sharing a smile.

“Things are good.” Dean says.

“Really good.” Cas adds.

Dean grabs Cas’ hand and kisses it.


End file.
